long time no see

Sorry it's been forever since I've checked in. I've just been blah lately. I think I'm suffering from burn out, or something. I'll get over it soon, I think. I know it's just my state of mind.

Meanwhile I've been successfully maintaining. I don't really know how, but I know the scale isn't moving much up or down. I feel like TOM is just around the corner, but it won't go ahead and get it over with. It was supposed to be over with by Friday, but nothing yet. You know the feeling. "Come on already! I'm ready for my body back, please!" I've just been bloated and a little quick to cry, but not really a hormone monster. The unexplainable anger and frustration hasn't happened, so I guess it's all good. :o) (I'm sure you all really wanted to know about my cycle and state of mind, didn't you?)

We're having a "Harvest Party" at church on Saturday, and Jeremy and I have decided to dress up like hippies. Sadly, I already had appropriate clothes in my wardrobe. All we had to buy was wigs (he's wearing an afro and I'm wearing long blond hair) and blue eye shadow. It should be really cute. Jeremy disturbingly really likes the blond wig. Lol. I now know why Cher always flipped her hair in that weird way. Having hair past your butt is a pain! After our party we're going to my dad's for our annual bonfire. I guess I'll have to ditch the wig after everyone gets to see our costumes. I'm sure it's really flammable and as clumsy as I am...

That's about it in Mandy Land. I guess that's one reason I haven't blogged. I don't really have anything to say, if you can believe that!

Well I'm off to see what ya'll have been up to. Have Great OP Days!!

a bleah blog

Ick. I'm bloated and my tummy hurts. I thought it was TOM symptoms last night, but my poor hub woke up at 2 with intense stomach cramps, too. I guess we got a bug or something. I hope it all settles down soon. He felt better this morning, but mine's still lingering. It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't HAVE to come to work today. My coworker is out of town and that only left our boss to come in and open the office and I knew it wasn't worth it. Maybe he'll have pity on me and let me leave early.

It's not that bad, really. I just don't want to be here. :o)

But it's Friday and that's reason enough to be happy, right?

I hope you all have wonderful weekends!

I love Wednesdays!

I really do love 'em. I really don't know why, I just do. So yay for Wednesday! :o)

Remember a little while back when I said that I was afraid of Mandy with out birth control? Well, she hasn't been that bad. Despite the extra stress of this week and several funerals to attend I've managed to only cry once. And that was after a sad movie. (Had I realized that it was sad I wouldn't have watched it...) And I haven't been mean to my hub, either. I called after work last night to warn him that I was feeling extra stressed and maybe a little irrational, but I didn't even have to control myself. I wasn't feeling like a hormone monster at all. So yay!

That just goes to show you that God really does answer prayers, 'cause I'm sure my sweet hubby has been doing some major praying this week! :o)

And I expected a big headache, too, because a few days off the hormones always gave me a splitting eye headache. But I'm on day six with no drugs and no headache. I'm beginning to think that I'm actually going to like not having these extra hormones I was so dependent upon. And maybe I'll lose a few extra pounds, too. Mom always said that BC made you gain weight.... (but I honestly always thought that she said that to prevent me from taking it BEFORE marriage!) lol.

Okay, sorry I'm rambling on about this. It's just fascinating to me. :o)

I got some new clothes in last night from Wal-Mart.com. I've been cruising the clearance racks from all my favorite online stores and I've managed to find a few things pretty cheap. And shipping isn't bad either. I'm wearing one of my new outfits today and the whole thing cost less than $20. I've never shopped for clothes online and actually bought anything before, but I could really get the hang of this. Since I'm such a regular size it's hard to find cute stuff on the clearance racks (I mean, really, how many woman wear large tops and 14/16 bottoms? A ton!) and this way I can find the cute stuff and just return them at the store if it doesn't fit. I found some great Dockers khaki's for the hub from Sears, too. They were only $24.99 a piece and I got free shipping. I think he's scared that I've found a way to bargain shop while at work. But how cool is it that I'm getting paid to shop? I love it! :o)

I hope you all have wonderful Wednesdays!!

Is it Friday yet?

Thanks for all of your supportive comments yesterday. The in-laws behaved marginally well, so that's a relief, and my ten hour work day flew by. Today is another busy busy day (because "we" didn't get it all done yesterday) but I can handle that.

The scale is up, and I'm thinking that it could be from an upcoming TOM. Or it could be eating too much junk. Whatever it is, it's not something that I can't handle. I'm sure if I pound the water for the next few days it'll be back down.

I've gotta figure out what I'm going to be for Halloween. Any suggestions for an easy, cheap costume? (umm... that is, one that's easy and cheap to make, not one that makes me look cheap and easy) :o)

I hope you all have wonderful Tuesdays!!

a little vent...

My weekend was non-existant. I feel horrible complaining about it, but I can because it's ya'll and I know you love me. :o)

Jeremy's great aunt died in a really bad car accident on Friday. I never got to meet her, but she was a really sweet lady. He was asked to do the funeral and so most of our weekend was spent either with the family or preparing. But that's not what I'm complaining about, really. It's part of being in the ministry.

My complaint is my FIL's family. Ya'll, they are so bad. Like, bad bad. Like, pulling weapons on each other, selling pills, cheating, cussin, mean, lying, horrible people. And I'm being nice. (okay, not really, but I'm definitely not exaggerating.) The lady who died's immediate family is really sweet, but all the rest of them are no count. (That's what my MIL calls them.) :o) We have nothing to do with them at all costs, but there was no avoiding them this weekend. And they definitely put on a show. At least the funeral is today and then I won't have to see them for a while. It sounds horrible, I know, but it's the truth.

So, needless to say, when I had to come in to work an hour early to make up for time lost at the funeral I was in a bad mood. I'm not a morning person to begin with, but I had a serious case of the grumps... and then I read ya'll's blogs and it brightened my day. So now you can spend the rest of the day knowing that you're personally responsible for me not going crazy ballistic on the in-laws that I don't claim. :o)

So, I'm off to actually work. Today's the busy deadline day that I've been mentioning and it's really not busy enough. (as in, peeps aren't getting enough work in to me and things are totally not going to get done on time - but as long as it's not my fault...)

Happy Monday!! :o)

can you keep a secret?

Psst. Hey. Come over here. I wanna tell you something. But you gotta promise not to tell anyone else, okay?

Jeremy and I decided last night that we are no longer going to prevent pregnancy. As in, the BC pills are going in the trash. Yay!! :o)

We decided that we're trusting God with every aspect of our lives. And we're going to trust God with our children's lives, so why not trust Him in the timing of those lives being created?

I personally have no qualms against birth control. Obviously, I've been on it for the past three years, but it has felt like I was taking control of things too much. For some woman that's a good thing, but for me it was taking my babies out of God's hands. I've wanted children with every fiber of my being for a while now (like, nearly 3 years...) and it gives me so much peace to know that it'll happen when it's supposed to. Now, I know that God can overcome the powers of birth control, but this way I'm not putting myself in His way. Does that make sense?

So you're the first and only people that I'm telling. It's too weird to tell people IRL. I know they know what we're up to (mainly because they razz us about if for some weird creepy reason. No one wants their mother saying, "Fooling Around" at all, much less as often as mine says it!) But if I tell them that we're trying then they'll KNOW what we're up to.

Oh goodness. And when we have to announce that we're pregnant, they'll definitely know. I'm gonna die.

They say that prudish woman are no longer prudes after birth. We'll see. :o)

Have Great OP Weekends!!

Toot Your Own Horn Tuesday

Yesterday was another non-OP day. Darn. Between this unexpected, unfair TOM and the extra stress of this week (all you other accountants and accounting support staff can understand...) I just can't handle it. So I'm going to maintain. I'm not taking the week off - I'm just not going to add one more thing to my crazy week. Besides, I've never worked on maintaining before. I'm either OP or waay off plan so it'll be good to have this week of "normal eating habits". That is, the eating habits that I want to have once I stop trying to get this last 10 pounds off.

So, since I'm not going to be blogging about the things we put ourselves through to lose weight, I've decided to blog about loving ourselves. I know - I've blogged about it before, but it's a big deal to me. I was cruising some sites yesterday and I found a really interesting one about BMI. Now, I personally think the whole concept is a bunch of bunk. According to them I'm obese and until I get under 145 I'll be overweight. My mother weighs 145 and she's tiny - and two inches shorter than I am. According to "them" my mom's overweight, too. And she's a size 6/8. She's a tiny little crazy running around thing and they think she's overweight. That's why I think it's bunk. But, just in case you think this is some sort of anomaly, check out this http://kateharding.net/bmi-illustrated/

People come in all different shapes and sizes. I don't think that God created us to all look the same, and I'm finally getting that into my thick head. (pun intended!)

So, check it out and form your own opinions. Be sure to notice the atypical triathlete while you're there. That one even surprised me. :o)

And be sure to toot your own horn today. Love yourself and let others love you, too.

Now let's all gather around the camp fire and sing Kumbaya. :o)

boo!

I did so great Friday and Saturday. I was totally OP - and I even faced down some really sinful looking chocolate cheesecake at the cookout.

But then Sunday it wasn't so good. I started out fine with breakfast, but after church the hub really wanted Mexican food...

My chips, rice and beans were definitely not low carb, but I at least ordered fajitas and not something fried. And then I felt guilty and decided for some strange reason to have a cheat day. But it wasn't too bad. I think the only other non-low carb thing I ate was an apple strudel, but that sucker had to be loaded and it wasn't that good.

But I'm gonna blame it all on TOM because I started today and it's not even my turn! (sorry if it's TMI - shoulda warned ya'll) It's not fair, but at least it explains the gain that I saw on the scale on Saturday (before my bad cheat day...). So I'm throwing back the water today and getting right back on the horse. I'm gonna try not to weigh myself for a few days so that I can assume that my efforts are working again and not let this surprise TOM get me down.

I do have to say that I at least had some control on my cheat day. I didn't eat everything in the house. So that's good, I guess. We can't be perfect 24/7, but I was hoping that I could make it OP for a good stretch. But today is a new day, and my body has already worked out all that sugar.

I'm so proud of the progress that all of you are making. Ya'll keep up the good work & have wonderfully OP days!! :o)

and all the heavens sang

I was totally unaware of the controversy surrounding James Frey. I really don't care because I read it like it was fiction, so that just goes to show you how "aware" I am of Oprah. :o) It is disappointing that the author was such a poser. Who would want to claim that sort of lifestyle? That's like a chronically skinny girl claiming that she was once fat.... (Okay, maybe not quite the same thing)

So today is Friday. Ahhh Friday. The day before the weekend. The day of anticipation of what's to come. The day of jeans at the workplace. And its the day of WI for Christmas Challenge. You know I've had a really good week when I get all excited about WI. :o) And here's the results: (hold on to your panties!) 182.6. That's 3 down from last week (and like 7 down from the beginning of this week). Now I totally realize that it's water weight, or crazy Atkins loss, or Alien abduction of fat cells or something crazy, but it's a loss. And if I keep it up it'll be permanent.

I'm still rockin along with the low carb. And I have a NSV to boot: I didn't scarf down my entire plate of food. We went to Ruby Tuesdays last night and I got the petite sirloin, broccoli & mashed cauliflower. And the salad bar, of course, because what person in their right mind can resist it? Well, I ate a big salad with lots of low carb yummies and when my food came I only ate about half the food. I realized that I was full and that I was satisfied and that I didn't need to eat anymore. This is HUGE for me because I'm such a carnivore and I LOVVE steak and I was really digging the mashed cauliflower. But I just got a to-go box and it'll be a meal for me sometime in the near future. What's really cool is that I could have eaten it all and Dr. Atkin's wouldn't have had a problem with it at all. But Core would and I chose to listen to reason. :o)
Yay Me! :o)

I could ramble on forever today, but I'm gonna spare you all. Instead I'm gonna go check out some of my co-Christmas Challenger's blogs.

Good Luck to all my Canadian friends as they face their Thanksgiving this weekend, and may you all have totally OP weekends, whatever your plan may be. (That sounded totally WW zen, didn't it?) :o)

inspiration from an unlikely source

I'm totally kickin Dr. Atkin's booty. I'm limiting the fats & still doing Atkins straight up. And the scale is showing it already. I was 184 exactly this morning - so that's already a pound lost from last week. Official Christmas Challenge WI is tomorrow so I'm excited to be able to post a loss. :o)

I just finished reading a book called A Million Little Pieces by James Frey. Have any of ya'll read this yet? It's one of Oprah's books, but I bought it because I found it really cheap at a warehouse store. (Although Oprah seems to have pretty good taste in books...)

It's about a guy going through rehab and the people he meets there. I won't ruin it for you, but it really make me think. I mean, if there's people out there trying to kick drug addiction the least I can do it kick the carbs, right? I may have had a slight headache the past few days, but these people go through some serious DT's. And if a crack addict is strong enough to come off of it, then surely I am too. It just sorta puts things in perspective, you know?

But before you run out and buy this book, I must add my disclaimer. The language used is filthy. Horribly filthy, so much so that I sorta became immuned to the f-word. And I really don't like that word. But I personally think it's worth skipping over words to get the meat of it. But it's offensive. (But not racist or degrading to women. Although the protagonist is an atheist there's an overall support in the belief of God...) I would love to take a lit class on this book.

Okay. Now I'm showing you how nerdy I really am. But just think about that, ladies. Really think about what some people have to endure. And in most cases, they're in the place that they're in for the same reasons we are where we are - We decided to abuse a substance. I abused food. They're abusing hard drugs. We're the fortunate ones by far.

I know this line of thinking has made me feel much stronger against temptations. I hope maybe it does a little something for you, too.

Have Wonderful OP Days!!

Livin La Vita Low Carb

I know you've probably heard me say this a million times, but it makes me giggle every time. What can I say? It doesn't take much to get me tickled! :o)

Yesterday went pretty well. I stayed completely OP, and I didn't eat after 7'ish. (we won't mention that it's because I went to bed early with my headache and the hub wouldn't fix me turkey bacon because he said that it had nitrates that would just make my head hurt worse. I don't know if this is true or not. I half-way believe that he just didn't want to do it. How mean is that?) :o)

Today is off to a much better start. My headache is gone, I'm already drinking the water *stops to guzzle more* and my breakfast was much yummier. Two eggs and three pieces of turkey bacon. And a cup of coffee. Yum yum.

Today is my last day sans exercise. I'm walking tomorrow with my mom and I'm gonna try to keep it up. I'm feeling pretty good. I'm not eating too much fat and I'm getting in lots of good protein. I'll really have to work on getting in the greens, though. All I had yesterday was a salad.

Oh! And I was teasing Randi because this weekend is Canadian Thanksgiving and she asked us to keep her accountable. Well, I really rubbed it in that I wasn't going to have those temptations this weekend and I could be really hard on her. Karma must have caught up with me because we were invited last night to a cook out on Saturday. There's no telling what they'll have there (definitely hamburgers) and it'll be a real challenge for me to stay OP, but I'm bound and determined to do it. I'm gonna bring a few low carb sides like deviled eggs and maybe a seven layer salad or something. And I guess I'll bring some sugar free pudding for dessert 'cause there's no telling what the sweets will be. But it'll be the first time my whole family has gotten together since my little brother was married, so it'll be nice to have our first family dinner. I'm sure my little sister will bring her bf, but I guess we can allow one non-family member. :o)

I hope you all have wonderfully OP days!

{{hugs!}}

give me drugs!!

I've got a huge headache this morning. Maybe carb withdrawals? It seems awfully early since I've just had one meal sans carbs. Maybe my body knows what I'm fixing to do to it and it's rebelling.

Randi & Candace have gotten on to me for being all over the map, and I totally hear you girls. I've talked a big game about doing one thing or another, and honestly I just haven't done it. Not for enough days in a row to really be following a program. So, I'm going to do a modified Atkins (again, modified as in I won't eat unlimited amounts of fat) and jump start myself. I need to see some drop on the scale in order to stay OP. Thank goodness I've never hit a real plateau - I don't think I have what it takes to make it through that. My deep respect goes out to you ladies who have.

I started my morning with 2 eggs and a sausage patty. It was one of those pre-cooked thingies and it was really nasty. I squeezed no telling how much grease out of that sucker before I ate it, and it still was gross. I think I'll let the hub eat the rest of those babies and I'll stick to turkey bacon. I love that stuff and it's really easy to fix here at work. I'll eat a grilled chicken salad from somewhere to get in some greens and I have some lf cheese and a low carb/low sugar yogurt smoothie thingie for snack. I'm gonna have to get some benefiber or something like that to keep me regular since I'm sure I'll be eating a lot of cheese. (TMI? Sorry!) And I'll also pick up a really good multi-vitamin to make up for limiting my diet so much. I should be taking one anyways. And after a few days I'm going to try really hard to get back to walking. I know I need the exercise and now that it's cooled off some I have no excuse, right? Maybe I can even manage to walk during lunch without coming back looking like a lobster.

I haven't said this in a while, but I really love our community. I love that ya'll really care about me and that you're not afraid to give me a reality check when I need one. Thanks for the accountability. Without ya'll I would have given up a long time ago. I know that I'm not really OP right now, but you ladies make me want to get back OP. (Mainly because I'm afraid of some of you and I know I'd really miss ya'll if I just stopped checking in!) :o) So, thanks a hoot! I love you bunches! :o)

Have wonderfully OP days (and pray that my carb detox doesn't end up in some sort of multi-person man-slaughter!)

Monday never looked so good...

Yay! I'm back! This past weekend has been so wild that it's actually nice to come into work and get back into my routine. I need routine.

We left out Thursday night and made it as far south as Montgomery. We slept in and lazed around a little Friday morning and headed into Auburn (which is a great town) and then went to our meeting. It went really well. I think that they liked us and I really liked them. Send me your email and I'll send out a mass email with all the details, okay? Even if I already have your addy, give it to me again because I can be a real ditz and you might miss out. I'm sure you're all just dying to receive your very own personal email from yours truly. :o)

We woke up at the butt crack of dawn on Saturday morning to make it to Atlanta by 9:30. (and we lost an hour going over the state line so we really woke up BEFORE the butt crack of dawn) The class was on Spiritual Maturity and Prayer and I really enjoyed the tools that she gave us. One of the books is a daily devotional and Jeremy and I have started using it every night before bed. It's really neat and it kinda spurns you to certain thoughts vs telling you what to think. Very cool. :o)

Sunday after church we took our kids to the Space and Rocket Center in Huntsville. I think everyone had a lot of fun and it was nice to get to spend the extra time with our "kids". When we first took on the Youth Ministry one of our girls was so shy and never would let you take her picture. When we got home last night and was scrolling through the digital camera we realized that this same girl voluntarily took a picture with me. Jeremy told me to pose next to a yellow submarine (because I like the Beatles...) and Hannah just decides to pose next to me. We have other pictures of her smiling and having a really good time. It really touches my heart. :o) My sweet hub also pulled out our photo album and had me look at some pictures taken in January, just before WW, and said, "Can you not see the huge difference in you now and then?" It was definitely a boost - especially after the non-OP weekend that I just had. Needless to say with all the running around I didn't make the best choices and the scale is back up to 190. But I know that most of that's just water retention and TOM so it'll be back down in no time. (I predict a big improvement by Wednesday).

I think I'm going low carb (not quite Atkins because I don't like the high fat) just for a few weeks and then switching back to something less restrictive. I guess I just want a few weeks of quick gratification. I can't seem to settle on anything before going somewhere and throwing everything out the window. Maybe I can stay in town for the next few weeks and stay OP! (Although the Fiddler's Convention is this weekend. I'm just gonna have to have some will power against those funnel cakes!) :o)

Well, I have tax returns to assemble so I really should stop rambling. I hope you all have wonderful OP days!! :o)